Before you die…

Or this post could have been titled “Ease the burden of loved ones.”  Because I’m an estate planning attorney, the “Before you die…” advice I’d typically give would be to have a will or living trust plan prepared.  I certainly always recommend that advice.  This post, however, is different.

I recently read an article I loved, “You Need to Make a ‘When I Die’ File–Before It’s Too Late.”  The article speaks to the side of estate planning that I rarely participate, and that’s the grieving family part of planning for what happens after you die.  I help my clients get all the documents they need, and advise on decisions that need made.  What struck me about the suggestions in this article though were actions to take that speak to people you love.  The article adds two items to the typical estate planning checklist, i.e., an ethical will and letters to loved ones: “[W]here a legal will transfers assets, an ethical will transfers immaterial things: your life lessons and values.”

An ethical will supplants a traditional will, and might be used to explain why you chose one child to serve as executor over the other child, or why you chose close friends as guardians for your child over your siblings.  “Letters to loved ones” is self-explanatory, and I highly recommend it if you have children who might have difficulty remembering you if you die when they are young.

As the author states:

The point of all this is to make a difficult thing like dying or loving someone who is dying less difficult. In that sense, creating a When I Die file is an act of love. It will always be too soon to tell your story and let people know how much they mean to you, until it is too late.

If you have any questions about estate planning, email me at julie@juliemillslaw.com.

Has a nursing home asked you to sign?

Your mother, father, aunt, etc., is moving to a nursing home.  You accompany your dad, for example, so he won’t be going through this alone, and he might need help completing paperwork.  The nursing home asks, or requires, that you sign as hi—STOP!  Don’t sign!

The nursing home asks you to sign as your dad’s “personal representative.”  Or to sign as guarantor.  Or to sign anything.  What you are likely doing is signing an agreement to be held financially responsible if your dad, through his insurance or Medicaid, does not or cannot pay his bill.  This might happen if his Medicaid application is not approved, or if insurance denies his claims, or any number of reasons.

But, the nursing home simply wants you to sign as the “responsible relative,” the person who will take steps to see that Medicaid or insurance pays your mother’s nursing home bills, right?  Or as the point person who will track down information, call the insurance company, provide information, right?  You would certainly agree to help your mother this way.  The problem is that you have unwittingly agreed to also be financially responsible to the nursing home for your mother’s bills.  Just ask Judy Andrien.

This practice by nursing homes occurs regularly, at least according to what I see and hear.  It happened to my family member, where the nursing home left his sibling lying out in the hallway on a gurney until the family member signed as “personal representative,” assuring this family member that “oh, it’s just a formality–we never pursue payment.”  They did pursue payment.

It is illegal under the federal “Nursing Home Reform Law” (summarized here) to require or request someone to sign as a guarantor as a condition of someone (usually a family member) being admitted, or of being permitted to continue to stay.  Nursing homes often get “crafty,” however, by asking family to voluntarily sign, whether as personal representatives, the responsible party, guarantor, etc.  “It’s just a formality….”

As an attorney, I have handled matters where stunned family members come to me with 5-figure bills from the nursing home, where the nursing home says that they signed as a financially-responsible party and now the bill is due.  At this point, one of the the only arguments is that my client did not sign voluntarily which can be a difficult argument to make, not to mention costly in attorney fees.

My advice if you accompany someone other than your spouse to a nursing home to be admitted?  Do not sign anything.  Period.

If you have any questions, contact me at julie@juliemillslaw.com.

What it’s like to be a court-appointed guardian?

The Canton Repository newspaper wrote an excellent article on serving as a court-appointed guardian.  The name used is CASA (court-appointed special advocate) or GAL (guardian ad litum).  CASAs/GALs are typically appointed for incompetent adults, or for children, in court proceedings.  In almost every court, CASAs and GALs are needed.  I like this article’s explanation of what the role requires, and especially how those who’ve served explain what they do. The article focuses on Stark County in NE Ohio, but the roles and experiences apply throughout Ohio.

When should I update my estate plan?

An estate plan consists of a last will and testament, possibly a trust, along with additional documents necessary for situations involving incapacity or death.  Additional documents can include a financial power of attorney, advance directives (living will for end-of-life decision making, and a healthcare power of attorney), and a funeral declaration, among other documents.

You should review your estate plan every five years to see that it still reflects your wishes.  However, if any of the following occur, then you should review your estate plan sooner:

Marriage: if you get married, or particularly if you get re-married, you need to review your estate plan.  If you are married and die without a will, state laws of “intestacy” (dying without a will) might not result in a distribution of your assets as you would want.  Furthermore, divorce and re-marriage do not automatically remove your ex-spouse from existing documents.

Children (birth, adoption or marriage):  the critical reason for reviewing an estate plan after you add a child to the family is to name a guardian who will care for your child should you (and your spouse, if married) die.  This is not a decision that should be left to a judge you do not know.  Another reason is to direct assets to provide for your child if you are gone.

Divorce: many states have laws that treat ex-spouses as having “predeceased” their divorced spouse in certain situations with some estate planning methods.  It is best to not assume that such a law will pertain to your documents. Part of your divorce or dissolution journey should include an estate plan that removes your ex from your documents.

Death of a spouse: if a spouse dies, you want to be certain that you have successors listed in estate planning documents, and you want to update deeds and titles to property.  For example, if you have a financial power of attorney and your spouse is the only person you named to serve as agent, you will need to update this document with the names of others.  If you owned property jointly with your spouse, you will need to remove your spouse’s name if you intend to convey that property (you’ll need to have a new deed prepared to your home).

Change in assets:  when you acquire assets, you should ensure that your estate plan addresses where those assets will go upon your death.  If you have 8 acres that your two children will inherit and plan to divide equally, and then acquire 5 more acres, who will inherit the 5 acres if you do not specify it in your estate plan?

Relocation:  most estate plan documents are valid in other states if you move, as long as the documents were executed properly in the state where you lived when they were prepared.  There are special considerations in some instances, however, when you move.  For example, if you move from a community property state to a common law property state, or vice versa, then you should definitely have your current estate plan reviewed by an attorney in your new state.  Additionally, bond might be required for out of state executors and others, so you might consider choosing in-state people to serve in these fiduciary roles.

Change in status of guardian, trustee or executor:  did the person you named as the guardian of your child die?  Move to Europe?  Become incapacitated?  The same consideration is valid for an executor or trustee.  If yes, consider reviewing your documents to remove them and replace with alternatives.  Perhaps after you named your cousin to serve as the guardian of your three children, she has had four children—would she be able to care for seven children?  After you named your brother to serve as guardian of your child, he started a career where he travels more than he is home—would that be a suitable situation for your child?

Your estate plan reflects your wishes for the way everything will be handled at your death, and designates certain people to carry out those wishes.  Both the plan, and the people designated in the plan, should be current.

Contact me at julie@juliemillslaw.com to discuss reviewing and updating your estate plan.

Elderly parent and assisted living

A friend is facing the prospect of having to consider assisted living for her mother.  “Mother” is friendly, enjoys people her age, and although she loves all five of her grandchildren she does not want to live with them.  She wants to remain at home but, because of dementia, she needs a “memory care” facility.  She finally agreed to other living arrangements after forgetting about a pan of food frying on the stove and nearly burned her house down.

Addressing these issues before there is an immediate need for assisted living is preferable because an elder law attorney can work with you to qualify for Medicaid without losing much of what you own.  To qualify for Medicaid you must have no more than $1,500 in assets.  What you have, after considering exempt assets and other factors, must be “spent down.”  Taking this journey without an attorney is, in this attorney’s opinion, a poor decision.  Many people who decide to apply for Medicaid sell their home, mistakenly believing it will be taken–it is typically an exempt asset.  Unfortunately, then, the proceeds from the sale of the home (an asset that was previously exempt) are then a countable asset which will increase the amount you must spend down.

Takeaway: if a loved one will be entering a nursing home or assisted living facility, and will need to apply for Medicaid, consult with an elder law attorney.  The money you pay for the attorney’s counsel will likely not come close to the money and assets you will protect if applying for Medicaid.